Thursday, June 30, 2005

Bono's old clothes

I read recently that U2's lead singer Bono was suing some ex stylist of his because he wanted clothes. Now ordinarily a singer asking his stylist to give him some clothes is not a very strange phenomenon; I mean stylists are there to recommend dresses and stuff. But you see Bono is no ordinary singer and his demand for clothes is quite extra ordinary.

Now why is Bono not an ordinary singer. For one he is probably the only modern day rocker whose name is an adjective. “But aren't names nouns? My III standard English teacher told me so” I hear you ask. Let me explain. See Bono gets his name from “Bono Vox” which are words from a very old language now spoken by really old men in the Vatican and in Biology text books – Latin. In English “Bono Vox” means “Good voice” and Bono when he started singing was told he was too loud so he dropped his voice and became Bono. If you've been following the elementary lesson in Latin very carefully will now realise that Bono means “good”. So basically Bono is an adjective. See I told you he was no ordinary singer. Bono is good, really really good.

Now coming to Bono's old clothes. Bono wants his ex-stylist to return a few of his 18 year old clothes that he claims she stole and she claims he gifted. Let me ask you all a question “Do any of you have any item of clothing that is 18 years old?” I mean do you want to wear clothes that old. Apparently Bono does and he is suing her to get those clothes back. Now people if you have really old clothes that you were wondering how to dispose of may I suggest that you get in touch with Bono. He lives some place where the streets have no name with someone who moves in mysterious ways. He frequents some discotheque near his house quite often to recover from his bouts of vertigo. I am looking for my diapers which I wore when I was 2 months old. I am sure I can sell them to Bono.

I wondered why U2 released an album titled 'All that you can't leave behind' I know now what they were referring to – Bono's old clothes.

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