Monday, November 29, 2004

Copulatory Practices of Blood Sucking Organisms: A Practical Handbook

Some time back my buddy ac put a blog post about mosquitoes and suze put a comment about mosquitoes doing it and all and then vinod put an even better comment. So all this talk about blood suckers and it reminded me about this book that I came across once. It's called 'The Copulatory Practices of Blood Sucking Organisms: A Practical Handbook'. Now this book u see is very hard to find and very few copies exist now. A Romanian friend of mine called Vlad had it and told me lots about it.

This book is only available in hard cover to live up to its topic of discussion and there are no soft copies of it available on the Internet.

The book has a foreword appropriately titled 'Foreplay' written by the eVam Bats Theatre Quartet. These guys are famous for plays such as 'Sonar Yet so Far', 'Death at Dawn', 'A Cave Roof with a View'. They recently released a music video called 'Here Comes the Sun (I Gotta Run)'.They have also authored the wooden cook book called ' Steaks for Your Heart' which was a follow up to Ray Cadbury's 'Death by Worm Infested Chocolates'. The foreword should set u up for the rest of the book. As I am constrained by space I shall tell you about some of the interesting chapters of of the book.

There is this chapter called 'Lecherous Leeches'. Let me warn you that you should take whatever you read in this chapter with a pinch of salt or you will find yourself completely drained. This chapter really is meant for suckers.

Also present is a curiously titled chapter called 'Promiscuous Proboscis' which tells how a male mosquito manages to seduce a female anopheles mosquito without contracting malaria.

In '69 Ways to do It in a Coffin' we get to know about the techniques used by master vampires to do u know what they do best – suck blood.

There are chapters on Indian Zamindars of yesteryear and how they festered wounds and fostered bondage. Also mentioned are tales of Indian politicians and Indian software companies.

You will be glad to know that a movie based on the book is already out in Romania and will be hitting Indian theatres shortly. A reviewer in Romania who saw the movie with his wife felt the movie was fast paced and his wife felt that the ending came too quickly and she was left unsatisfied as usual. Another reviewer felt that the movie is very well paced and reaches an astonishing climax which is sure to leave you breathless thought not necessarily speechless.

Following the climax is a song that features Limp Bizkit which makes sure that you don't watch the movie for sometime to come.

The distributors of the film in India want to only keep night shows of the movie but are scared of competition from the movie 'Copulatory Practices of Carbon Based Bipeds Living in the Third Rock from the Sun' featuring Jenna Jameson and based on the book of the equivalent but shorter name by Madonna.

Thats all folks. I gotta go eat and then watch Area 88

No comments: